Wagner, Jim

In the spring of 2005, I lost my job and knew my time in Corporate America had passed me by. I started to painting and remodeling my house.  I believed I painted everything in the house. Then one summer day I was down in the poorly lit basement and something started to scare me. I was starting to see shapes, forms, lines, and color for what it was not the name of the object.  I took smoke breaks and truly looked at the shapes of the stairs and the shadows it was casting at different times of the day. I was getting a bit freaked out, I have been taking depression medication for about five years.  I called her and made an appointment. All this time I was thinking of what was happening to me.  I have felt this way before; it was Art knocking at my door. I went to see the doctor anyways because I feel when you get older you like to be reinsured before changing. I told her of the strange things that were happening to me. I even told her that I felt the application of paint was a very sensuous activity. That’s when she stopped me. She said, “ I have one thing to say – paint! By all means paint!

For the first time in years, I actually had time to view my house and my family with the full attention. These things started to inspire me. I started back into the swing of things with an old camera. I went back to those stairs in the basement. I had to finish that study. Finishing is an important part I learn in the past thirty years. You finish the job no matter how silly it may be and believe me I have finished a lot of silly jobs for the Corporation. Every project I took on was like the first one I ever did as a child. I was starting to us all my senses. I was alive once more, a human being learning and feeling.